No one ever said that working in the pro wrestling business was easy. Regardless of what your role is in the business, you have to deal with a lot of shit. You get it from the wrestlers, the promoters, the agents, and most of all – the fans. No one is ever satisfied with your work or efforts, and at the end of the day your ‘thank you’ comes in the form of a big steamy turd. Just when you think you have the right formula to entertain the masses, someone is always there ready to drop a deuce all over it.
On the flip side of the coin, I shouldn’t be pointing stinky fingers because I have also been critical of the current product. Then again, I’m not the one with a multi-million dollar empire and staff full of veterans who should know better and be capable of wiping their own ass. Week after week, wrestling programming leaves a foul stench and mental skid-marks in what use to be man’s favorite soap opera and pseudo sport. Now I just wait for the punchlines and fantasize that I’ll see a cameo from Triumph The Insult Comic Dog who will look into the camera and say, “This is a GREAT wrestling product…for me to poop on!”
I’m sure you’re wondering what’s with the verbal diarrhea of the mouth? Why take a dump on an industry that you’ve been involved with since 1992? Why am I ready to flush the pro wrestling business like the drizzling shits? The answer is simple… It is what it is. But in this instance, it’s just one of those moments where the figurative sense turns into the literal sense. Allow me to set the stage for you.
I’m working a mega-convention in New York being run by a rookie money mark promoter. The event itself is an unorganized disaster and one that will go down in the books as an epic failure. I’m interviewing most of the talent for a yet-to-be-released DVD. Next up on the slate is former WWE superstar, Al Snow.
The place is packed and the only spot quiet enough to shoot the video interview is in a small office the size of a jail cell. Four grown adults cramped into this little room with no air conditioning in the middle of summer. Not the ideal set up, but when you’re on a run and gun mission, you’ll take what you can get. Fortunately, the interview came off without a hitch. Al shot with us for over 20 minutes and gave some real insight into the psychology of the business and the flaws that are deteriorating it. There was even a brief cameo by Shelly Martinez and Mick Foley.
For the purpose of my in-house branding, I always get the talent to do a quick promo bumper for me. A bumper is basically a short piece infront of or right after the content where the talent looks into the camera and says, “Hi, I’m BLAH BLAH BLAH, and you’re watching DieHard Wrestling!”. Those bumpers are nice little branding interstitial that helps build credibility for your product. Now before I go any further, let me first warn you that we had lunch with Al Snow a couple of hours prior to the interview. Nothing fancy. Think of it as a cheap ghetto date as we shared a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken.
When the interview was over, we were quickly prepping to shoot the bumpers when one of the guys on my crew (Toddy D) had to take a personal phone call. He left the small office space for a little privacy, but when he came back….let’s just say he was welcomed with a little gift courtesy of Mr. Snow.
Without going into anymore detail, I’ll let you experience it for yourself. Fortunately, you won’t be able to get the full “scratch and sniff” effect – but I’m sure you have plenty of personal experiences in your own memory bank that you can use to understand our dilemma.
Check out this never before seen exclusive blooper outtake!!!